I am too lazy to update the web side but back end is up to date.
| Hash Details | |
|---|---|
| Hash Number: | 1172 |
| What: | Hockessin Hash #1172 |
| When: | Jan. 21, 2017 |
| Where: | 1337 S. Old Baltimore Pike, Newark, DE |
| Hares: | Circle Jerk Do Me On the Beach Jewel of Duh-Nile | Message |
| What: Hockessin Hash #1172 When: Saturday, January 21, 2017 AD at 3pm, HST Where: Iron Hill Park — 1337 S.Old Baltimore Pike, Newark, DE 19702 39.631833, -75.756877 Who Hare: Jewels of Duh-Nile, Circle Jerk, and Do Me on the Beach Why: Circle Jerk’s 20th Hash Anal-versary (or at least pretty close to it) Friendlies: Trail - dog friendly, Apres -- no dogs in house (except Eddy) — fenced yard at house D’erections: From I-95 Exit DE Rt 896 South. Turn Right onto Old Baltimore Pike. Proceed about 0.8 miles and turn right into park. Proceed up park road to parking lot at the end of the road. (CJ says he would rather start in the parking lot for the museum but it looks like they close that now). Got lost? Who cares, but you can call help may be available. | Hashers |
| Asshopper Bunion Butt Bunion's Bitch Butthead Circle Jerk Closing Time Dead End Devil Woman Dirty Wet Pussy Do Me On the Beach F6 Fast Eddie Jewel of Duh-Nile Lost Penis Mount Me NecroPheelMeUp Pickle Dick PubeHeAteHer RaidR Skidmarks Tinsel Tits Tits of Steel Wet Lay Wet Nurse Woody Woodpecker | Hash Trash |
| Trash for Hockessin Hash #1172, Circle Jerk’s 20th Analversary Hash So, the slobbering pack met at one of our favorite loitering spots, Iron Hill Park in one of our favorite cities, Newark, DE on a gray, damp, high 40-ish degree afternoon of January 21, 2017 AD. Hashers I remember encountering at some point or other included: Butthead, Circle Jerk with Fast Eddie, Do Me On the Beach, Woody, PubeHeAteHer, NecroPheelMeUp, Skidmarks, Lost Penis, Bunion Butt, Wet Lay, Devil Woman, Jewels of Duh-Nile, Dirty Wet Pussy, Pickle Dick, Tinsel Tits, Wet Nurse, Mount Me, Tits of Steel, Asshopper, RaidR, Bunion’s Bitch, Fuck 5, Closing Time, Dead End and ...? Our hares for the day were Circle Jerk (celebrating his 20th analversary of hashing), Jewels of Duh-Nile (celebrating his virgin lay), and Do Me On the Beach (celebrating not doing trail and drinking wine while preparing food). Circle Jerk had informed the wanks that today’s trail was to be a reenactment of the very trail that brought him into the hasher fold 20 years ago and would be an A to B trail. Jewels of Duh-Nile was serving as Circle’s young apprentice to learn the fine art of haring in hopes of becoming a Hash Master himself one day. The pack was also told that we would get-off at exactly 3:15, so to stick to the schedule and stave off any blue balls, our RA Skidmarks circled us up for chalk-talk at the witching hour (or pretty close to it). Circle had thrown down some “basic” flour marks, including checks, a Beer Near, two Turkey/Eagle splits and some Falses that may or may not be marked, but assured us that at least 4 marks in a row would mean we were “On-On.” Prior to us getting-off, it was suggested that Butthead carry the hash shit because he couldn’t shut his pie hole long enough to pay attention to what was going on, however Dirty Wet Pussy volunteered instead due to the likelihood that Butthead would not bring the hash shit back for another 3 years. And so, we were finally given the ok to blow through the true-trail arrow and cum-on already, so ... On-On! PubeHeAteHer and Bunion’s Bitch chose one of 3 trails which happened to be wrong, but eventually we found flour leading off to the right heading us down some precarious muddy trails. The FRB’s got thrown-off of some checks, but somehow we all made it safely down a steep hill and followed a mucky trail to the left until it brought us out to a road and a bridge across I-95. We ended up in another park with a paved path to find the FRB’s dicking around on some checks, but at last we made it out to a neighborhood and a check leading up or down a hill. Though it’s usually unwise to give up the high ground, trail actually went down the hill and headed left into another parking lot where Dead End was waiting for us at the Beer Near (yay!). While we sipped our shitty suds and waited for the rest of the slobs to stroll in, including Asshopper who was practicing politics with one of the locals, Bunion’s Bitch (in his signature black shorts) was busy looking for where trail went next. Finally after several not-so-subtle hints, he eventually convinced us to follow him onward with Circle shouting “Are you sure he knows where trail goes?” Only one way to find out ... On-On! Circle did inform us that we might come across some old marks as Miss Piss and MFP had laid some trails here in recent weeks, but fortunately the old marks were mostly in red and blue so we tried our best to not get distracted and stick to the fresher-looking flour. Luckily, no one ended up in the creek as we navigated our way over the rooty, muddy embankments. Eventually we came to a bridge where the first Turkey/Eagle split was discovered. The Eagle trail continued along the creek and became less of a “trail” as we got deeper into the shiggy and some well-placed thorns. We came upon a check which prompted us to come out of the shig too early where we found marks that had us No-No-ing on the Turkey trail. After we met up with the rest of the pack who was aimlessly wandering around an intersection, Circle graciously pointed us dumbasses in the right direction so we could back-track to the actual trail. On-On! After touring the neighborhood for a while, we came upon the second Turkey/Eagle split where Skids called “On-On” and DWP and some other unsuspecting Turkeys cut trail to follow him and ended up on the Eagle trail instead. Aimless running being good for body and soul, we continued on this long, getting-longer adventure into some more shiggy where Skids and Pube were led off on a ring-around-the-rosy trail allowing the rest of us to catch up. We headed out of the woods up a hill steep enough to have us grabbing the adjacent fence for support and out we went through the “University” neighborhood. We bounded down a huge hill, turned a corner and at long last discovered the “On In” where Dead End was waiting with a cooler of beer along with Mount Me who had apparently been the first of the Turkeys since most of them were still wandering around on the Eagle trail. An arrow pointed us to the home of Wet Nurse who had laid the trail and made Circle Jerk cum 20 years ago (also where Circle met Do Me ... and the rest as they say is ancient history). We circled on Wet Nurse’s back deck as Circle Jerk told us stories of how none of the houses around here were here 20 years ago because he and Wet Nurse were older than dirt. We serenaded our shitty virgin and veteran hares for their shitty trail being way too short. Asshopper, Bunion’s Bitch, Pickle, Tinsel, RaidR, Fuck 5, Closing Time and apparently half the pack drank for interruptus while the other half drank for not having ever laid a trail in Iron Hill Park. Since last week, Devil Woman covered enough hash crashes and blood on trail for the next several months, there were none of those. Tits of Steel drank for trying to disguise her race wear by turning it inside out. And finally, after the cold had seeped in and our teeth began to chatter, Woody began to utter, “May the hash…” and Tinsel Tits, who apparently thought Woody was taking waaaay toooo loooong, finished it with, “Go in peace!” It’s ok, I’m sure he’ll have a chance to say it again some time. We were then told that we could trek the 2 miles back to our cars, or hitch a ride with Dead End, Circle or RaidR, which I’m pretty sure most of us opted for. Following circle, we headed over to Circle and Do Me’s house where Do Me had prepared us a fine feast of hot dogs, chili, salad, chips/salsa and of course plenty of wine and more beer. Wet Lay made an apparently lovely carrot cake for Circle’s 20th analversary, however Fast Eddie the dog found the cake in its container on the floor, knocked off the lid while no one noticed and helped himself to the best part of the cake—the butter cream icing. So, in true hasher form, we cut off most of the slobbered-on parts and ate the cake anyway. And tasty it was! And all in all it was another shitty trail. Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1173 this Saturday. On-On!NecroPheelMeUp | |