I am too lazy to update the web side but back end is up to date.
| Hash Details | |
|---|---|
| Hash Number: | 1199 |
| What: | Hockessin Hash #1199 - the Aloha Hash |
| When: | July 26, 2017 |
| Where: | Judge Morris area of White Clay Creek State Park, Newark, DE |
| Hares: | Bumpy Beaver Weird Al Spanks the Bitch | Message |
| What: Hockessin Hash #1199, the Aloha Hash When: Wednesday, July 26, 2017, at 6:30 HDT, Where: The parking lot for the Judge Morris area of White Clay Creek State Park, across from county branch collection area, on Polly Drummond Hill Road just off of Rt. 2/Capitol Trail/Kirkwood Hwy. Who Hare: Bumpy Beaver and Weird Al Spanks the Bitch What Else: Hashers put on your grass skirts. It's an Aloha Apres. H4 Goes Hawaiian. Lots of Rum and Beers of course! Prizes for the "Tiniest Bikini" and Tackiest Tommy Bahamma Shirt. Also limbo lower contest! Hash Cash: $7.00 Friendlies: ??? D’erections: From I-95, take exit 3 onto Route 273 West. Go 3 miles; turn right onto Red Mill Road. Make a quick left to stay on Red Mill Road. Go 3 miles, when you cross Kirkwood Highway, road name changes to Polly Drummond Hill Road. Look for parking past the past the Judge Morris on the right. | Hashers |
| American Halfass Asshopper Bumpy Beaver Bunion Butt Bunion's Bitch Butt Lite Closing Time Cousin It Dancing Fool Dead End Devil Woman Dirty Wet Pussy Do Me On the Beach F6 Grassy Ass Groper Hare Today Cum Tomorrow Jewel of Duh-Nile Lost Boy Magic Carpet Ride Mary Fucking Poppins Mount Me NecroPheelMeUp Nip Fuck Perfect Woman Pickle Dick PubeHeAteHer Rack Attack Shit Out of Luck Slutmaster Smells Like Hash Spirit Spunk Monkey The Wetter the Better Tickle Me Homo Tinsel Tits Up Piss Creek Up the Rear Weird Al Spanks the Bitch Wet Lay Wishboneher Woody Woodpecker | Hash Trash |
| Trash for Hockessin Hash #1199 So the slobbering pack gathered up at the Judge Morris Estate section of White Clay Creek State Park for the Aloha hash on the fine temperate early evening of July the 26th, 2017 AD. Hashers I remember being present at some point: Cousin It, Dead End, PubeHeAteHer, NecroFeelMeUp, Asshopper, Wetter the Better, Mount Me, Devil Woman, Do Me on the Beach, Bunions Bitch, Wet Lay, Bunion Butt, Pickle Dick, Tinsle Tits, Jewel of Denile, Spunk Monkey, WIshboneher, Hare Today Cum Tomorrow, Dancing Fool, Smells Like Hash Spirit, Slut Master, Perfect Woman, Mary Fucking Poppins, Woody, Magic Carpet Ride, Dirty Wet Pussy, Grassy Ass, Tickle Me Homo, Groper, Up Piss Creek, Lost Boy, Up the Rear, Nip Fuck, Rack Attack, Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck, Closing Time, Buttlite, Just Deb, Just Sherri, Just Yani, Just Alex, Just Chris and many, many others. Our hares of the day were Bumpy Beaver and her partner in crime Weird Al. Who thus decided to make this Hawaii or island themed hash and thus requested the wankers to don hawaiian shirts, and or, grass skirts, and or, bathing suits and such. And for a while we enjoyed some fine brews in the 70 degree weather with no humidity not common in these parts until all the late cummers finally arrived. Our summer RA, Wishboneher circled us up. And pitiful effort to give a chalk talk was given by Weird Al. Though his effort was significant, compared to the effort made by the slobbering pack to listen to it. There was to be a Turkey/Eagle split, though the Eagle trail wasn’t going to have many marks on it but one would eventually loop back to where the Turkey’s were by just following the beaten path. This, Weird Al, made sure to inform one or two people. Myself not included. There was also to be a beer stop, but it would be hidden, and not be marked with all with any beer near mark, as I guess the hares were running low on flour that day. Yep, they didn’t even put an arrow down to point us in the right direction, though after some pressure Weird Al agreed to gesture which way for us to go. In other words, it was your typical summer Wednesday night trail put on by the Hockessin Hash House Fucking Harriers! On! On!We ran to and through the trails of the wonderful Judge Morris Estate. Finding a check here and an arrow there. Soon enough we came to the Turkey Eagle Split, where some of the FRB’s and a few of the DFL’s got themselves lost, as there were only two marks on the Eagle trail and nothing indicating which path to take, once the path split in two. Some of us had the good sense to turn around and go back to the Turkey Trail, and find Bumpy Beaver who was sweeping for us, even though she admitted she hadn’t laid the marks and didn’t exactly know how where it was going.. Anyway, while a group of us stood there for a minute trying to decide where to go, Dancing Fool broke out a spare bottle of pre-mixed Margarita that he had on him. And so some of us got to have a double secret shot-stop on the trail. Yes, it paid to be a turkey on that day. On! On!We get to a check, where some FRB put a stick arrow going ... apparently ... in the wrong direction. As all the FRB’s who tried to follow the Eagle, got lost and or confused except ... apparently ... PubeHeAteHer, who at least found where to beer stop was, and ran back to find all of us. By this point, I understand, Up the Rear lost trail and went home or disappeared in the woods. And has not been seen since. On! On!Trail goes through the rest of the woods. Though most of us were not on it. Then it came out to where Polly Drummond and Old Coach Rd meet. And across the road was Weird Al with the unmarked beer stop. About 3/4ths of the pack was able to make it there and enjoy a brew despite the great effort on Weird Al’s part to get everybody lost. While we were hanging out there, some civilian, who turned out to be friends with Nip Fuck, pulled over on the side of the road and told us Nip Fuck wanted to say hi. Soon Enough we were off. On! On!Trail ran through the middle run section of the park that Weird Al and Bumpy Beaver almost always hare through. There was a check with a false trail going in the opposite direction of where we needed to go to get back to our cars. And so, nobody who wasn’t a visitor fell for that one. Just across the road from our cars the “On! In!” mark was found, with Bunions Bitch being the first to arrive Eagle, and yours truly being the first to arrive Turkey. One, by one, by three the rest of the hashers got back to point A, except Up the Rear, who, hopefully won’t end up in the newspaper. Tinsel Tits got the credit for being last in. And here we were joined by the auto-hashing Rack Attack and Nip Fuck, who had just sent her regards through that friend of hers a few minutes before. Magic Carpet Ride once again loaned us that nice, handy folding table of hers. And circle us up, Wishboneher did. Awards and penalties were dished out. Songs were sung. The hares drank at least 3 times. Though they may have been guilty of more violations than that. And we had quite a few interruptus that had to drink. Along with our two virgins, Just Yani and Just Chris, with that big funny earring of his. Our visiting hashers from California, Grassy Ass and Tickle Me Homo led us in a rendition of the “God Bless My Underpants” song. Grassy Ass, who is also known as “Spunk Monkey” in some travel hash circles, because so many have mixed he and Spunk Monkey up, called for a down for all Asian people. This got expanded to all brown people, which then got expanded to include also all people who used to live in Africa, Asian, brown or otherwise. Several other people drank for several other things. And Woody for the first time in over a month, finally got his closing line right. And so the hash went in piece. For the Apres’ we adjourned to Weird Al’s pad, where we had a cool Luau setup, and a fine spread of BBQ pork, chicken and pineapple shish kabobs, and interesting rice dish, potato chips, some tasty fruit, and some tasty pineapple cake and coconut pie. This, to go along with a great variety of wonderful tasty beer. And the post trail entertainment was above the average level of entertaining. As first their was a bikini contest, easily won by Spunk Monkey. Followed by a much more hotly contested limbo contest that must have gone at least 12 rounds. That came down to an intense competition between our home town champ, Wishboneher, and the visiting challenger, Tickle Me Homo. Despite having the advantage in terms of height and flexibility, our local hero eventually collapsed under the pressure of her adoring fans, or perhaps from having too many beers. And so the visiting challenger from California went home with the trophy that day, a bottle of wine, I think. However, a fine time was had by all in attendance, despite how shitty of a trail it was. Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1200 AKA The 2nd anniversary of the Fuck Wingnuts! trail in Kennett Square this Wednesday.On! On! MFP | |