I am too lazy to update the web side but back end is up to date.
| Hash Details | |
|---|---|
| Hash Number: | 1191 |
| What: | Hockessin Hash #1191 - the Surprise Wedding Hash |
| When: | May 31, 2017 |
| Where: | 1715 Lovering Ave, Wilmington, DE |
| Hares: | Hare Today Cum Tomorrow Wishboneher | Message |
| What: Hockessin Hash #1191, the Surprise Wedding Hash When: Wednesday, May 31, 2017, at ... think wedding timing -- Cocktails, 6:15pm, Ceremony (chalk talk), 6:45pm. Where: 1715 Lovering Ave. (Rear), Wilmington, DE 19806 (behind Ricciardi Bros. Paint - formerly Shinns) What to Wear: Cross-dressing optional. Hash-appropriate poems for the bride and groom are welcome! Who Hare: Mystery Hares Friendlies: ?? De’rections: From the north on I-95, you can exit at Rt. 202 North and find your way to the Augustine Cut-off, cross the river, and take a right onto Lovering Ave. From the south on I-95, exit at Rt. 52 North and take right onto Van Buren St, and go 3 blocks and take a left onto Lovering. Go about 1/2 mile and look to your right, just past Gallucios, behind Ricciardi Bros. | Hashers |
| Asshopper Bumpy Beaver Bunion Butt Butt Lite Chasez Boyz Closing Time Cousin It Dead End Digital Dick Dirty Wet Pussy Do Me On the Beach F6 Groper Hare Today Cum Tomorrow Lost Penis Mary Fucking Poppins NecroPheelMeUp Perfect Woman Pickle Dick PubeHeAteHer Seaman on the Poop Deck Skidmarks Slutmaster Smells Like Hash Spirit Spit Bucket Spunk Monkey The International House of Virgins The Wetter the Better Tinsel Tits Tits of Steel Triple Whore Score Up Piss Creek Vomit Comet Weird Al Spanks the Bitch Wet Lay Wishboneher Woody Woodpecker | Hash Trash |
| Hockessin Hash #1191 So, So the slobbering pack gathered up in the alley behind 1715 Lovering Ave, on the other side of the hares pad, on the fine early evening of May the Turdy-First, 2017 AD for the mystery wedding hash. Hashers I remember being present at some point: Fuck 5, Closing Time, Pickle Dick, Tinsel Tits, Dead End, Spit Bucket, Cousin It, Lost Penis, Skidmarks, Chasez Boyz, Perfect Woman, Weird Al, Bumpy Beaver, Groper, Just Joe, Dirty Wet Pussy, Spunk Monkey, Mary Fucking Poppins, NecroFeelMeUp, PubeHeAteHer, Semen on the Poop Deck, Slutmaster, ButtLite, Digital Dick, Asshopper, Wetter the Better, Bunion Butt, Wet Lay, Do Me On The Beach, Smells Like Hash Spirit, Groper, Woody, The International House of Virgins, Tits of Steel, Just Joe, Just Kevin, Just Jules, Just Kyle, Just Vincent, Just Mary-Kate, Just Matty, and many, many others. Our mystery hares of the day were Wishboneher and her partner in crime, Hare Today Cum Tomorrow. As they were who we all were suspecting were the secret couple about to be betrothed, especially since Wish was donned in her nice little skimpy, white get up. For a while we hung out in the alley behind her pad enjoying brews provided by Cousin It and some others. And that along with some fine Champagne provided by Andre’. And that along with a view under a skirt provided by Wishboneher. Eventually chalk talk was attempted, and the hares and other members the pack dis-orderlerly explained the marks to the virgins Just Vincent, Kyle, and Just Mary Kate, who, I heard were the new neighbors of the hare, and accepted this debacle as their welcome to the neighborhood party. We were told to expect a shot stop, 2 beer stops, and several photo ops. We were given a hint of the general direction of the trail and soon enough we were off. On! On!Trail went out over to Kentmere Parkway, with a few checks here and there. And soon we came to the first Photo Op. This in front of a statue of Mr. Bayard, who ever that was. The FRB’s had no patience to wait for the DFL’s and we were off again. On! On!Our hare, Hare Today C. Tomorrow, appeared closer to the front and began giving away the direction to go in at all the checks. This I suppose, perhaps, because he had no confidence in his mark laying abilities. And if that was the case, he was right about that. On! On!Trail went past another photo op, at a monument to a Mr. Bancroft, who may or may not be an ancestor of Asshopper. Soon we went into Rockford Park, past the famous tower and down hill into the woods, with the FRB’s going right past the shot stop. And so would everyone else have, if the Hare hadn’t appeared yelling to everybody where the shot stop was, with the SN mark on a rock, facing a bush, and facing away from where all the other marks were. Those of us fortunate enough to make it to the shot stop enjoyed some flavored liquor bottle shooters, though there also was included some hard-core booze in that stash. At this point we also lost a number of walkers as they decided to head back to point A. But those of us left continued on. On! On!We ran into the shiggy along the Brandywine River going under a bridge or two. Checks took us to true trail which took us off the beaten path and put us right back on it after going through several obstacles. Smells Like Hash Spirit performed a spectacular hash crash, her first in over a decade she claimed. Somebody bitched about catching a tick, and everybody else bitch about something or other at some point. On! On!Trail came back out to the asphalt and those of us left in the middle of the pack got stopped at a check for a while. This in spite of the hint left by one of the FRB’s. Yours truly, MFP, then Asshopper were however soon able to sniff out trail that soon took us to the first Beer Stop by the old burnt up, half converted to condos factory called, The something Mills along the something Brandywine or other, where we have stopped for beer many times before. Here us in the middle caught up to the FRB’s who were working on their second beers by this point. And we were also joined by the auto-hashing Spunk Monkey, who went to the trouble of dolling himself up again in honor of the impending mystery wedding. But before the sun went down we had to get a move on. On! On!Trail went across the pedestrian bridge, and into Alapocas Park for a little while. One of the Virgins, Just Somebody, found the true trail at a check, just as our FRB Pube was about to get himself lost again. And up a steep ass hill we went. On! On! We came out back to the asphalt, across the road and to a check or two. We got ourselves quite confused as we always do in Wilmington during the summer. That by all the utility markings which look similar to hash markings, especially when light starts to run low. Trail went under the big the 1-95 bridge and past a beer near mark, which none of us saw, because it was getting dark, and it was written lightly in red chalk. On! On!So we ran down the running path along the Brandywine, until we stopped and turned around, barely hearing Woody or somebody yelling “Beer Near” back in the direction we had come from. And so, we went back under the bridge, to the “Beer Near” mark we did not see and drank beers out of the cooler that we also did not see, because it was behind a bush. And so we gave Hare, the hare, a thorough verbal lashing about his trail laying abilities, or lack there of, again. Though this gave some people still out on trail walking time to catch up. Including Closing Time, who managed to endure almost the entire length of trail after 6+ months of pregnancy. On! On!We followed trail back across to the other side of the Brandywine, and lost the marks at about where Lovering Avenue began. PubeHeAteHer and F-5 (soon to be F-6), ran back into the deepest darkest woods looking for marks, but the rest of us said “fuck this trail” and went back to point A, about 5 or 6 blocks away. Point B was behind a building next to point a, where a table was set up, along with a lovely white curtain set-up for the upcoming mystery wedding. We enjoyed some junk food waiting for everybody else to get in. And soon enough the wedding was to commence. Our Minister of the day, with his script, said a few words, as Wishbonerher and Hare Today stood along side him. Then a banner was rolled out which indicated that the couple to be married was, unbeknownst to them, our favorite long-term unofficial couple: Lost Penis and Skidmarks. “And den dey ware maw-weed”, I was asked to put in this write-up. The couple were good sports about being married before being consulted about it first. Even after enduring many tearful congratulatory remarks, from many in the pack, who still do not realize that this was another prank. After the minister, Chasez Boyz, finalized the hash wedding, a box of live birds, were released into the wild, in celebration of this event. We hope that some of them got to live at least a couple of days to enjoy there freedom. So after the prank wedding, your RA’s Wishboneher, and yours truly MFP, attempted to run the circle ceremony, with awards and penalties dished out and songs sung. Because it was getting late, and people were still dealing with shock, many of the usual penalties/awards were skipped, like birthdays, that at least two of us had that week, and race shirts, and hats in circle. Some of the virgins were brought into circle before being instructed on how to do a down down, but they seemed to understand to the concept. And there was an attempt to name Just Kevin after some incident where he messed his trousers. But a lack of consensus in the group led to his naming being tabled for another time. Soon enough Woody let the hash go in peace. After circle we went over to Halligans bar (formerly The Famous Somebody bar) for the Apres’ There we enjoyed much rejoicing, with some fine salad and sliced chicken breast, 3 tons of a tasty Lasagna/ Ziti hybrid dish and a wedding cake, in honor of the newly weds. All and all it was another shitty trail. Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1192 this Wednesday.On! On! MFP | |