Hockessin Hash House Harriers History

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Hash Details
Hash Number:1129
What:Hockessin Hash #1129 - The Lives or Works in Kennett Square Hash
When:April 2, 2016
Where:473 E. South Street, Kennett Square, PA
Hares:Devil Woman
Lost Penis
Skidmarks
Spunk Monkey
Wet Lay
Message
What:  Hockessin Hash #1129, The Lives or Works in Kennett Square Hash (yeah, we know, it smells like sh*t)
When:  Saturday, April 2, 2016 at 3:00 pm, HST 
Where:  Gran Sasso, 473 East South Street, Kennett Square, PA
Who Hare:  Devil Woman-2 in a row, Wet Lay, Lost Penis, Spunk Monkey, and Skidmarks
Why:  For some April Fools Fun
What Else:  Dry bag is a really good idea
Friendlies:  Dogs -- Trail yes, Apres no. Good boy!
D'erections:  From I-95, take Route 141 North, exit to Route 52 North.  Go 4.7 miles, turn left onto Old Kennett Road near Winterthur. Go 4.7 miles, Old Kennett Rd turns slightly right and becomes PA-82 N. Go 5 miles, look for Gran Sasso on the right.  More parking is available in the YMCA lot right next door.
Hashers
Asshopper
Bunion Butt
Bunion's Bitch
Butthead
Cause for Blindness
Circle Jerk
Crash Test Dummy
Cribsnatcher
Dead End
Devil Woman
Do Me On the Beach
Flounder
Groper
Kum On Inn
Lost Penis
Mandible Down
Mary Fucking Poppins
Mount Me
Pickle Dick
RaidR
Skidmarks
Spunk Monkey
The International House of Virgins
Tinsel Tits
Trail Order Bride
Wet Lay
Woody Woodpecker
Hash Trash
Trash for Hockessin Hash #1129
So, the slobbering pack gathered up in the back parking lot of the Grand Gasso, I mean Gran Sasso restaurant and or the YMCA next door that one of our hares requested that we park in at the last minute in downtown Kennett Square on the fine, but windy spring afternoon of April the 2nd, 2016 AD. 
Hashers I remember being present at some point: Dead End, Groper, Radar, Cause For Blindness, Flounder, Asshopper, Mary Fucking Poppins, Woody, Bunions Bitch, Bunion Butt, Do Me on the Beach, Circle Jerk, Mount Me, Mandible Down, Kum On Inn, Trail Order Bride, Butthead, Pickle Dick, Tinsel Tits, The International House of Virgins, Crib Snatcher, Crash Test Dummy and many, many others.
We had nearly as many hares that day as hounds as we were treated to the Quintet of  Wet Lay, Skidmarks, Lost Penis, Devil Woman, and Spunk Monkey who came together to hare in the theme of their shared association of Kennett Square, the mushroom capital of the world.
While the beer was in the lot behind the Grand Gasso, the excitement was apparently at the YMCA, and so our group remained split for most of the pre-lube festivities until one of our hares, and our RA for the day, Skidmarks, managed to wrangle the group together for the chalk talk.
We were told that trail that day was to be marked with flour, and there would be chalked used, along with some toilet paper that may or may not have been used.  It was hard to tell because of the mud and because that area smells like shit anyway.  We were told the standard marks would be used, but with some additional shenanigans such as the OTF mark, the witchy way and some other nonsense. The arrow was true, as we were instructed, and at about 20 past three, we were off.
On! On!
Woody and Bunions Bitch ran off in one direction where no marks were to be found, but that never stopped them. Yours truly found a mark behind a telephone pole on the other side of walnut street, but did not find another one, because he forgot about the used toilet paper, I mean, the toilet paper used.
On! On!
Our hare Skidmarks ran in front of us for a second, so we would get the hint, and there were many marks leading into the damp muddy marsh, which those of us on true trail found ourselves ankle deep in.  While Woody, as usual, found a way around, and several of the other hares led the more squeamish ones around another way.
On! On!
After the marsh land, we hit some shiggy, then went up and down a few hills, some more than once.  We went in back of some former farming related facility, and then back into the woods.  Where the group got confused by a check again. And it was On! Hare! for a little while after that.
On! On!
True trail was found going down a path, until the notorious OTF mark was found, along with a bottle that was labeled as vodka, but contained something that more resembled cough syrup.  In following with the tradition of the OTF mark.  The group was to stay there until the contents of said bottle were consumed, with each person touching the foot of the person they were to pass the bottle along to.  It was fun while it lasted.  But fortunately, it did not last long.  It was not that big of a bottle.
On! On!
Back on trail we went, an into a town house development it lead us.  A check we found, and the group confused for a while.  While we played with a deflated basketball and were mocked by some 12 year old girl using the swing set who claimed to know where trail was going, but would never, never tell us.  Eventually someone found some very obvious looking marks which lead us out of there and around a fence.
On! On!
Through an industrial complex or two we went, a check back was discovered and then a witchy way. Some people went one way through a very concerned locals yard, while the rest of us went the other way around until we all converged on the ancient rail line that all hashes in Kennett Square must go through at some point. Flounder, Mandible Down and some others went down a false trail until Skidmarks pointed out the false to them, and Butthead disappeared for a while going the opposite direction.
On! On!
True trail went up the hill and past some more locals drinking their own brews, until we cut through some trees and came out to the complex that Spunk Monkey works at.  And there we found Spunk, and his big green truck with the beer for the beer stop.  We enjoyed our brews and sat in the sun for a while, while also enjoying a break from the wind. 
On! On!
Trail stayed on the asphalt for a while, then went through a park, around a pond and past a quarry we went.  We came out to an intersection and found the Turkey-Eagle split. 5 or 6 hashers took the Eagle, and the rest lumbered down Walnut street on the Turkey, with Cause For Blindness, by some miracle being first in for the Turkeys and first in over all.  Mandible Down was the first in for the Eagles, and I don’t remember who was last in, but they must have been really, really slow. 
After everybody got back, except those who left before, and those we forgot about, circle was opened behind The Grand Gasso.  Penalties and Awards were dished out, songs were sung, down-downs were done, as we passed around some left over Easter Candy and some version of cheesy poofs.  The hares were made to drink many, many times, as was Cause For Blindness, or at least she tried. The auto hashers drank and the interruptus drank.  Yours Truly, MFP had decided to retire that pair of hash shoes.  And Do Me On the Beach felt it would be appropriate to have some ceremony for this.  But instead she just got to drink out of them.  Soon after announcements were made, before Woody received the signal to let the hash get a piece.
We then adjourned to the ristorante, where we enjoyed many different kinds of pizza to go along with our pitchers of beer.  As we got to sit on checkered tables.  Some of us stuck around long enough to watch some college basketball and a fine time was had.
But all and all it was another shitty trail. Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1130, this Saturday.
On! On!
MFP