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|What:||Hockessin Hash #1128 - The Almost Easter Hash|
|When:||March 26, 2016|
|Where:||Delcastle Recreation Center, Wilmington, DE|
|What: Hockessin Hash #1128, The Almost Easter Hash|
When: Saturday, March 26, 2016 at 3:00 pm, HST
Where: Delcastle Recreational Center, 970 McKennens Church Road, Wilmington DE 19808
Who Hare: Devil Woman, Mount Me, and Toxic Shock
Friendlies: Dogs, trail should be fine ...
D'erections: From I-95, take Exit 4 to Route 7 northbound. Follow Route 7 north for about four miles as it becomes Limestone Road and then crosses Kirkwood Highway (Route 2). Cross Kirkwood Highway and then after 3/4 mile bear right onto McKennens Church Road. Stay on McKennens Church Road, crossing Milltown Road, and turn right at the sign for Delcastle Recreational Area. Drive around until you see Hashers. Park. Hash.
Cock a Doodle Don't
Dirty Wet Pussy
Do Me On the Beach
Magic Carpet Ride
The Wetter the Better
|Trash for Hockessin Hash #1128|
So, the slobbering pack did a déjà vu all over again and returned to Delcastle Recreational Center on McKennans Church Road in still beautiful suburban Wilmington, DE for the “Almost Easter” hash on an actual spring-like, upper 50-ish degree afternoon of March 26, 2016 AD.
Hashers I remember being present included: Wet Lay, Bunion Butt, Do Me On the Beach, Skidmarks, Lost Penis, NecroPheelMeUp, PubeHeAteHer, Cousin It with Famous Jack, Devil Woman, Woody, Butthead, Dead End, Toxic Shock, Magic Carpet Ride, Mount Me, Cockadoodledon’t, Dirty Wet Pussy, Asshopper, Wetter the Better, Groper and ...? Our hares for the day were the trio of Devil Woman, Mount Me and Toxic Shock who were un-phased that Bunion Butt had “stolen” their hash location the week before because they had their own evil plans for this week, and besides ... it wasn’t fucking snowing! Yes, spring was indeed in the air and our three bunnies had some special Easter treats in store as they explained during chalk talk. Trail was to be an A to A-Prime, in other words we were circling at a mysterious location where there may or may not be some hidden delicacies left by the Hasher Bunny for all the good little harriers and harriettes (“good” being a very loose term). Also included in the “treats” were a Shot Stop and Beer Near and depending on your definition of “treats,” some checks, and fuck-you’s as well. So, by the powers vested in our RA, Skidmarks the pack was instructed to hop on down the bunny trail and follow the white rabbit (or white flour), so hippity-hoppity we were eventually on our way.
Marks led us out along the paved path to our first check, which if this was any indication of how the day would progress, we would not be finding any Easter goodies until at least mid June. We followed several marks toward the park, however PubeHeAteHer quickly assured us that we were Fucked and had to check back to the road or head into the golf course. We chose the road, however headed in the direction where there were no marks until we spotted one of our bunnies, Toxic Shock standing firmly on the side of the road wondering what the hell we were doing. Devil Woman and Mount Me simply laughed with delight as we pulled our heads out of our asses and doubled-back down the long stretch of road from which we had cum. Skidmarks and Woody spotted some marks across an intersection which would benefit them later, but fortunately they also spotted Dead End over yonder, looking not at all conspicuous with a cooler containing the first of our Easter treats of the day. Shot Stop! The Shot Stop location from last week served us just as well this week as our hares got us all hopped-up on some adult candy in the form of Kahlua Mudslide, Horchatta and a tasty cinnamony liqueur. Some wankers had “found” some golf balls on trail that eventually got coated in the sticky goodness and ended up down a few people’s pants. Not to digress any further, the pack eventually licked their lips and whatever else appeared sticky-sweet in the vicinity and hopped-along again in the direction from which we had cum.
Here is where the mildly dim were separated from the hopelessly stupid. While Woody and Skidmarks returned to the marks they had spotted earlier, the rest of the pack apparently were distracted by a squirrel or perhaps the marbles rattling around in their brains and followed some marks into a neighborhood that led straight to a check-back 6. The three bunnies simply stood by and laughed that their evil plan had worked on the sheep-brained pack as they bah-bah’d all the way back yet again in the direction from which they had cum. Fortunately for the hopelessly stupid, the sugar kicked-in and we all headed across the intersection and “Oh look, some marks!”
Trail wound us up, down and around through a neighborhood until we came to a once-quiet street where the mildly dim of the pack were loitering around in front of someone’s house pounding more beverages and wondering what had taken the hopelessly stupid so long to arrive. Beer Near! Apparently Devil Woman was acquainted with the home owner who wisely decided they had somewhere else to be that day. As the pack drifted in, we slowly took over the street and let the occasional car through as we continued to chug our beers. At last, it was time to get-off again, so the FRB’s headed out on a final fuck-you circle jerk while the rest of the pack simply strolled to our final destination.
Fortunately, the Hasher Bunny (who looked a lot like Dead End) had arrived just ahead of us and had scattered all kinds of goodies throughout the yard of one of Devil Woman’s band mates, who was gracious enough to look the other way while we tore through the property in search of plastic eggs full of candy, or for the really “good” ones, shooters. While we hoarded, compared and traded (mostly hoarded) our treasures, Wetter the Better suggested to Skids that circle should be held in a foreign language just to see how much of an attention span the pack had left. So, without further ado, Wetter was appointed as proxy RA and ran circle in her best Afrikaans style, which turned out to be only slightly confusing and mostly amusing. The bunnies drank for not having enough Easter eggs on their shitty trail, or some other non-reason. We were able to interpret Wetter’s utterings surprisingly well enough to determine that Pube and Butthead were first and last in and that there had been no “bluud” on trail. Wetter sang a fancy jig while Necro and Groper danced for having donned bunny ears for trail. Cousin It and Bunion Butt (again?) drank for making it one more trip around the sun, and once everyone was out of ideas, Woody was summoned forward to demand that the hash get a piece.
Following circle, we all popped some more candy and moseyed back to the cars before the sugar rush wore off and ended up at the seemingly-familiar Famous John’s for some delicious salad, lasagna, mac and cheese, veggie pasta and more beers. All in all, it was another shitty trail. Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1129 this Saturday, which rumor has it will be in a different location and perhaps Woody will lead circle in Gaelic?