Hitting save is very important... database sync isn't working and I am lazy
|What:||Hockessin Hash #1338 - Leap Year Day Hash|
|When:||Feb. 29, 2020|
|Where:||Swift Memorial Park, Hockessin, DE|
|What: Hockessin Hash # 1338 -- Leap Year Day Hash|
When: Saturday, February 29, 2020 at 3:00 HST
Where: Swift Park in beautiful downtown Hockessin, DE
Who Hare: Devil Woman and Toxic Shock
What Else: There may be Leap Year-related Shenanigans. The trail may be dry. The trail may have a lot of shiggy. One or more of these statements may be false.
Hash Cash: $7.00
Friendlies: Leashed doggies are whole-heartedly welcomed on trail and the well-behaved ones at Apres. I guess you can drag along kids if you've got no other child care choices.
D'Erections: There are several ways to get there depending on where you're coming from. Map yourself to Swift Park in Hockessin but NOTE THAT THE ENTRANCE TO THE PARK PARKING LOT IS ON OLD LANCASTER PIKE BETWEEN YORKLYN AND VALLEY ROADS. Google Maps will take you to the library parking lot (where you can park in the lower rows) but we will be circling in the parking lot on Old Lancaster Pike.
Dirty Wet Pussy
Do Me On the Beach
Magic Carpet Ride
Up Piss Creek
Weird Al Spanks the Bitch
|Trash for Hockessin Hash #1338|
So, the slobbering pack met up at Swift Park, in actual Hockessin, DE for the first time this year, on a mostly cloudy, windy, nippley low 30-ish degree afternoon of Saturday, February 29th, 2020 A.D. for the Leap Year Hash.
Hashers I remember being present at some point or other included: Do Me On the Beach, NecroPheelMeUp, PubeHeAteHer, Slut Master, Skidmarks, Lost Penis, Pickle Dick, Dirty Wet Pussy, Bitchard, Weird Al, Wingnuts, Up Piss Creek, Magic Carpet Ride, Bunion Butt, Wet Lay, Queen Pissanya, 7th Hole, Spit Bucket, Cousin It, Jubol, Woody, Groper, Just Louis, Just Caitlin, Dancing Fool and . . .?
Our hares for today were Toxic Shock and Devil Woman, who assured us that if we actually paid attention on trail, we may potentially win some special prizes today. And so, we braced against the wind and each other for warmth whilst sipping on some cold brews as everyone slowly dragged their asses in for chalk-talk. Devil had also cum with a pile of old hash shirts, just in case someone needed a memento or an extra layer. Our RA, Spit Bucket herded the cats together so that the hares could explain the myriad of marks they had thrown-down. There were to be the usual flour blobs, some checks, falses a check-back of unknown number, a turkey/eagle split, a beer near (yay!) and a true-trail arrow pointing us in the direction we should go. And since it was cold as fuck, the pack did not linger and actually got-off relatively quickly for once.
So off into the park we journeyed where some teams of other dim-witted souls were actually playing softball on such a winter’s day. As we meandered, the FRB’s got hung-up on a few checks, one of which had us scattering in 3 or more different directions, with Pube, Spit Bucket and Skids all calling On-On from various locations. Somehow or other, we all eventually ended up on true-trail leading to a road which had us soon exploring the surrounding neighborhoods and hills of Hockessin, where we encountered many checks as we plowed through the chilly winds.
Eventually, we came upon a check at Cabot Drive where Pube and Skids could be seen peeking out from behind some cars in a driveway. Turns out, this was the beer near at the home of a friend of the hare’s. And so, we enjoyed some time out of the wind and sipped on some suds whilst the rest of the pack drifted in, including Dancing Fool who additionally provided us with a feast of Doritos and Mudslides. Here, Devil presented the Leap Year challenge, which included a Broad Jump contest and a prize for the hare and harriette who made it the furthest. Woody laid on the ground and offered himself up as a speedbump for others to leap over. Just Caitlin, Lost Penis and Spit Bucket managed to leap the furthest and were awarded some flavored vodka shots for their accomplishments. Then, Devil proceeded to educate us on the history of Leap Year and the reasons for all the calendar changes over the years, which probably had something to do with alcohol. Between the numbing cold and the numbing drinks, we did our best to memorize names, dates, facts, and figures since we were told there would be a quiz at the end for more prizes. And so, once our brains and our bellies has reached their max limit, it was high-time to venture further up Cabot Drive, so ...
Shortly after completing our leaps of faith, we came upon the turkey/eagle split. The eagles banged a right further into a hilly neighborhood, whilst the turkeys took a left Head-ing for the cars. At the bottom of a hill on the eagle trail there was a check-back 26 which Pube hit, then hid behind a tree so Spit Bucket could enjoy it too. The rest of us high-tailed it back, leaving Spit Bucket to run back up the hill solo until we came back to those sneaky hares laughing to themselves at the turkey/eagle split.
And so, we Head-ed down the turkey trail which led us down Old Lancaster Pike, past the seafood market, left through a parking lot, over some railroad tracks and back to point A and the On In at Swift Park. Except for Do Me and Pube who took a wrong turn before the railroad tracks and ended up running around the entire perimeter of the park, because apparently they needed some extra mileage.
Once Do Me, Pube and everyone else eventually made it back, we circled or squared-up at the behest of our bellowing RA, Spit Bucket. The hares were made to drink for their trail not being on a cold enough day and for having a check-back 26, which many thought should have been a 29 in honor of the date. Yours-truly managed to be FRB for the eagles and Bunion Butt got to drink for DFL. The interuptuses and visitors drank hurriedly, as the temperature seemed to drop further. Pube drank for being the “dick of the day” for his prank on Spit Bucket, though most of the pack felt it was acceptable hash behavior. Then, Devil quizzed us on the many Leap Year facts she had challenged us to remember, so we shouted many names, years, numbers and alternative facts, some of which were correct or close enough. More vodka prizes were consumed, some announcements were shouted out and Woody and some other self-appointed wanks declared that it was time we go in peace.
Following circle, we assembled at Famous Tom’s for some salad, pizza, and desserts provided by the hares. More beer was consumed, revelry was had and all in all it was another shitty trail.
Stay tuned for Hockessin Hash #1339 this Saturday.