I am too lazy to update the web side but back end is up to date.
| Hash Details | |
|---|---|
| Hash Number: | 56 |
| What: | Hockessin Hash #56 |
| When: | April 21, 1996 |
| Where: | None |
| Hares: | Fungi Woody Woodpecker | Message |
| Nothing here yet | Hashers |
| Hash Trash | |
| Grand Master: Cribsnatcher Religious Advisor: Village Idiot Hash Cash: Fungi Hash Drinks: Stun Gun Religious Advisor I.T: Up-Chuck Hash Horn: Fancy Pants On-Sec: Rubber Web master: World-Wide-Web Hare Raiser: Store Bought Hash Historian: Artful Dodger Hockessin HHH Hash Hot line: 302-NEEDFUN 4 #56 21 April 1996 ON ON Hares: Fungi and Woody Woodpecker Cherries: Lois, Big Shout Tom, Sue Attendance: nobody has been counting, maybe twenty five or so Setting: the greater Marshalton area Weather nice and in the seventies. Question: Whats that green shit growing on Fungi's ass? Hash time: 1:07 or there abouts Nice weather brings with it nice spirits and happy hashers. I think they even made a movie by that name- The Happy Hasher Goes to Washington. Excuse me, I believe that was really Happy Hooker. Oh well. Anyway, H4 members assembled in Fungi's new private parking lot behind his house. Dues were paid, a few beers drunk, and pleasantries exchanged. It was so nice that few really wanted to hash at all, and instead bask in the afternoon sun. After some coercion, Fungi led the hounds to his driveway where hash marks were explained, and he was even naive enough to warn us to stay off private property. Like we ever trespass. No, not us, were honest law abiding citizens. Right Rubber. With a wave of his wand, or what looked like one, he unleashed the noisy band of hounds on his neighbors. A mark lay in wait somewhere out in the street, but it was the wrong one. After a 1/ 4 mile warm-up the hounds found their way to the trail. The first checks encountered were quite nasty. Our trek through "tour America's Suburbs" eventually came to an end as the hounds entered a flood plain that contained a few more nasty checks. This led somehow to a local Pathmark and to the Kirkwood Highway. It was here that the hounds discovered Woody awaiting all, manning a tight rope into the sewer below, the hounds pretended they were army rangers (except for the Marines who fancied themselves circus performers) and scaled down the rubble and trash filled embankment. Once down, the hounds traveled through the drainage tunnel and down the creek. A small distance was traveled before a check was discovered atop old Capitol Trail. Marks were found in two directions for quite a distance aggravating those faint hearted hounds that prefer simple checks. Ah, there ain't no fucking rules boys and girls. True trail was found toward Wilmington and the hounds did go. After a distance of hard pavement the FRBs discovered a CB11 that was interrupted by beer stop attendants who directed everyone off trail to Fly Girls abode (maybe she should be called Unzipped Fly Girl). It was time to take a break. Some refilled their bods with water, some beer, some played with the lizard, some drained it. It took a bit of effort to get the hounds moving again since most were content to hang for awhile. Eventually all were back on trail again; the FRBs counted their way back eleven marks. At the transit mark, Woody made it easy for everyone by directing them into the stream below despite marks going the other way. Once down in the stream, the hounds found the footing tough and slimy. It was here that Fungi thought it was a water slide and preceded to fall on his ass. Eventually the trail led out onto some residential streets, and then back into the stream. Lets Get Wet Again was the theme of this run, and why not, it sure was warm enough. Marks were followed in and out of the trail. A few nasty checks threw the pack into confusion in a spot or two. At one point the trail led up a wooded cliff. Some hounds navigated around this obstacle while others scaled it. This led the hounds back into the streets where some boggle minded checks from the hares, and some decoying, led the hounds around a development to Rt 7. The on in was found across the street with awaiting lazy non-hashing type hashers and their vehicles. Soon a caravan was put together including Woody's comical work vehicle as the center of attention. After a few traffic causing jump starts, the load of hashers within were safely deposited back at the Fungi pad. For some reason there are those that find us hashers very scary. For inside of Fungi's house lurked other family members too shy to make an appearance. Outside though the Apres jumped into full swing. There was food to eat and liquids to drink. Veteran hashers worked on the cherries and sometime summers, poor inconsistent souls. Once again there was no hash trash, and the crowd grew angry. Lets get a pool going to see how many weeks it takes to get Cribsnatcher to bring the 50th trash to press. Anyway, we go on. Down downs started after a delay. The arcane and esoteric ceremonies were conducted by Cribsnatcher and Up-Chuck who first called upon the Hares to consume their victory beers. Next came the cherries, Tom, Louise, and Sue, who all agreed they never quite came like that before. W was the FRB of the day after Up-Chuck cleverly took the wrong direction at the last check where there were no marks found. Hashus Interuptus was the crime that all agreed perpetrated by Schmegma Head, who would rather be called Cheese Head. A beer of punishment was thus consumed by the felon in question. It was noted at the time that he had been in absence so long that his name had been removed from the mailing list. Finally, namings were in order for Zach, who shall be now known as KUNG FUK, and Dionne Fly Girl. How about Unzipped Fly Girl instead? Think about it. Before and after the ceremonies the hashers departed in small groups. In particular, Material Girl declared as she left "I do cum". And then she noted that she also cums too early unfortunately. While it is nice that she does if fact enjoy the pleasures of the flesh, it is a shame she does not seem to have the staying power for the long haul. In conclusion, the trail was good and tricky and the Apres a success. All in all, it was a great time. What did you think Ebert? I thought the plot was shallow and the burgers too thin. Oh shut up you fat slob. De Shadow Note: Descriptions or reproductions of the accounts of this event cannot be repackaged or reproduced without the express written consent of this pubic hair ication (and Madonna who apparently wants to start a dynasty of tasteless pop singers) and the HOCKESSIN HASH HOUSE HARRIERS. Violators will be damned to be renamed Schmegma Head if they complain about their current names. Remember When out on a hash run call out "on on" when you see marks, checking when you come upon a check, and looking when you are searching for true trail. And when you see someone sexy, make sure to say "whoa baby". Of course, make sure you bring a warm/dry bag for the apres. Attention all hounds, we will now be in water more often (this includes extra shoes). Other tips you may find helpful. First, do not stick your genitals in poison ivy when taking a leak, this includes leaning and squatting. Second, do not play with rabid squirrels. Third, never wear new shoes to a hash, unless you are Cribsnatcher and they are uncomfortable trail shoes. Receding Hareline Attention: take your turn at haring a hash. Don't be shy, help is available if you need it. If you do not you will summarily be abused. For those hashers new to us that have not yet hared and feel that you cannot take full responsibility, there are opportunities to be secondary hares with some of the experienced hashers below. So don't delay, sign-up today! 5/05/96 3:00 H4H58 Asswipe??? 5/12/96 3:00 H4H59 Rosebutt, Hang Two, Up-Chuck 5/22/96 6:30 H4H60 Stun Gun, Phladd (once known as Erection) 5/29/96 6:30 H4H61 Achey Breaky Balls, Groucho 6/05/96 6:30 H4H62 WWW, Cribsnatcher 6/12/96 6:30 H4H63 Tri-sexual, Toxic Shock 6/19/96 6:30 H4H64 Do Me on the Beach, and any other hares willing to lend a hand 6/26/96 6:30 H4H65 Up-Chuck, Store Bought 7/03/96 6:30 H4H66 Red, White & Blue Hash- Fancy Pants??? They'll stone ya when you're hashing in the Hood They'll stone ya when you're hashing in the woods They'll stone ya when you're hashing down the street They'll stone ya when you're suffering from the heat Well, I would not be so all alone Every hasher must get stoned Drink it down down down... Why are we waiting...? | |
| Files: | |
| Trash56.pdf | |